![]() ![]() ![]() The first benefit that comes from shadow work is accessing what some call the Golden Shadow, or all the potential for good that those Shadow aspects actually contain (Ketola, 2008). Perhaps I made shadow work sound simple just now – four quick steps, right? In fact, it’s hard and uncomfortable work, which is why the benefits of shadow work are valuable – a good return for your effort. It’s worth the discomfort to get things that matter to you.” Benefits of Shadow Work This sometimes looks like saying to myself, “Charlie, this is important to you and worth asking for. Finally, I had to accept that this is an ongoing pattern in my life, something I am responsible for catching myself doing and then changing. That’s why I would engage in that Shadow behavior.Ĥ) Owning the Shadow aspects. At this point in the process, I needed to admit where this was coming from: I am a person who values being of service to other people – and a person who fears being a burden to others. I was trying to get my own needs met without admitting it.ģ) Identifying with the Shadow aspects. Once I could recognize that pattern in my life, I had to call my “ generosity” what it really was: a backhanded way of being selfish. In my own work, for example, I had to first notice that certain behaviors I thought were very generous of me, such as doing things for people unasked, were actually motivated by a desire to have them do something for me.Ģ) Labeling Shadow aspects. While the specific tools and techniques used in shadow work can vary widely, there is a simple framework for describing the general steps in the process (Wilber, 2000):ġ) Recognizing Shadow aspects. And how do we do that? Shadow work, of course: the intentional, difficult process of facing our Shadow sides and integrating them into who we are.Īs noted above, the goal of shadow work is to fully own all aspects of oneself – especially the Shadow parts – and become a more authentic, integrated person. If we are lucky and courageous, we start to let those parts out of the bag. Over time, and with reinforcement from caregivers, peers, and teachers, we learn to present the sides of ourselves that other people seem to like while relegating the other sides to the Shadow.īly (1988) offers the compelling image of each of us dragging a big, heavy bag containing all our shadows behind us we filled that bag in childhood, and in adulthood. Each of us forms our Shadow side in childhood when we recognize that certain traits we have are pleasing to adults and get us what we want, while other personality traits seem to get us into trouble (Bly, 1988). Knowing what the Shadow is, what then is shadow work? Shadow work is the unification of who we consciously are with the parts of ourselves that we repress it is the integration of the bad and the ugly with the good, so that we become complete beings (Bertholo, 2013). For this reason, Shadows are more easily identified by other people, and conflict is likely to result when one person remarks on the Shadow side of another person. ![]() ![]() It is in the nature of our Shadows that we cannot see them clearly to look at them directly would be too painful. When we see other people demonstrating our Shadow traits, we may have strong negative reactions, because we (1) do not want to be associated with those traits and (2) may resent that other people get to express those sides of themselves, while we don’t (Jung, 1958). When we recognize our Shadow sides coming up, we try to avoid acknowledging those parts at all costs. The Shadow consists of the aspects of ourselves that contradict our characteristics that we do like and want to be recognized for. (I will capitalize the word to remind us that we are using a specific, psychology-based meaning of the word.) The Swiss psychologist Carl Jung, who is perhaps Sigmund Freud’s most famous trainee, described the Shadow as the repressed parts of ourselves, the parts we find unpleasant or cannot tolerate acknowledging (Jung, 1958). To understand what shadow work is, we must first define the Shadow. ![]()
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